Reflection

Well, I've fasted, and cleared my head as best as I could do.  It got pretty hard towards the end - I ended up feeling very light headed and had a headache too.  Not that I haven't fasted for a long while and I went longer than I initially planned to.  I went 48hrs in then end.  It wasn't initially intentional  but after I fell asleep at the end of day one and then woke up into day two, it seemed right ti continue.

So what did I hear? Indeed, did I hear anything?  That said, was I asking the right questions and was I asking hard enough?  The one thing that does seem to have made a bit of headway was a question that G put on her Facebook profile, about risking everything to travel to Mars one way, leaving everything else behind.  In that sort of situation I have to say that I would.  I'd leave everything in order to pursue  a means of getting away.  Suddenly this gets me thinking, this isnt really an answer to the questions that I have been asking, but it is an answer.  I hadn't really taken the time to conclude that I would actually be prepared to up ends and leave things.

Maybe a realisation then its not such  a  bad thing and that I should be ready to go with the flow on a change of direction.

I don't feel like this is the answer that I was hoping for - but who am I to decide what the right answer is?  One thing it has made me thin about is some kind of longer term fast.  Having done a bit of reading about fasting and how it was done in the time of Jesus, one theme keeps cropping up - that of fasting during daylight hours.  It seems logical, one could fast for a much longer period of time on such a method of fasting.  As we're only just past the autumn equinox, there's a fair balance between daylight and dark still.  If I was to do this, over what period of time? How?  If I was going to do this I would want to be able to go to church and pray - not necessarily in services but just to be able to go and sit quietly and meditate on the thoughts and questions that I have.

Many thoughts, and I'm out of time here as my break at work is over and i have to go back to the day job again.